How To Identify A Chronic Masturbator

Masturbation is a serious issue facing families today but most parents are just too embarrassed to talk about it with their teens. Heed Colossians 3:5: “Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.” If the sins of lust, covetousness, immoral thoughts, and pornography are forsaken and overcome, masturbation is a small offense that can be dealt with in the privacy of your own home. But when this self-indulgent practice becomes an addiction, it poses genuine health and spiritual risks, and also threatens workplace safety and the overall productivity of our

economy.

As a society, this degree of self-manipulation goes too far in familiarizing men and women with their bodies. These people become less active in their communities and begin to see themselves as sexual predators whose sole purpose is to climax at the end of the night. Masturbation has had a ruinous effect on the institution of marriage. Countless couples have been destroyed by porn addiction, many other men have just given up on the idea of marriage because they prefer to pleasure themselves whenever they choose, free from the interruptions of family life.

LOVING VIGILANCE: WHAT TO LOOK FOR

To help turn the tide on this crisis, it’s important for parents and work supervisors to be able to spot a chronic or even just a casual masturbator in their midst. Maternal wisdom has long stated that oversleeping, locked doors, avoiding eye contact, messy beds, fear of clean underwear, long steamy showers and a pungent bleach-like odor on one’s bedsheets are all red flags of masturbation invasion. One trick passed on to me is that you can press your nose to a young man’s mattress, inhale deeply and (irregardless of the smell) announce, “That smells like semen.” If the boy’s face turns red and he runs from the room, the evidence is clear.

Do Some People Have an Instinct For Spotting Masturbators?

There are people who claim they can identify a masturbator with one glance. It’s not magic, but solid human observation. Up to a half an hour after the act, the perpetrator’s face has several telltale signs. Facial muscles are far more relaxed than they normally are, minimizing the depth of creases and fine lines. On the other hand, the flesh of the cheeks and forehead is puffy and pink, flush with heightened circulation. There is evidence of fatigue everywhere, from a low hanging jaw to glassy eyes. This is compounded by a general guilt or nervousness as seen in the eyes and posture. It is the apparent contradiction of these characteristics– physically relaxed but psychologically bubbling with a shameful secret– that is the greatest indicator that someone has just masturbated.

The images below will help you spot the masturbators in your daily life. The first is a simple display of the most common post-ejaculative face types.

The graph below is a detailed exploration of the habits and appearances of the addicted self-abuser. This young man is putting his future at risk by devoting more time to masturbation than to looking for employment, socializing within his community and preparing himself for marriage. If pushed, he will lie, cheat and steal to support his habit.

Exhibits A & B: Can you spot what makes a masturbator in these famous faces?